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November 4th, 2007
03:03 am - Great Expectations.
Spitfire thin and strung like a violin, I was.
Yours was the face with a grace from a different age.
You were the sun in my Sunday morning.
You were the sun in my Sunday morning.
Telling me never to go.
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November 2nd, 2007
12:24 am - Flowerchild/Backyrdigan.
Lennon running around in our new backyard.
Post haircut that I strongly dislike.
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October 23rd, 2007
02:38 am - Swallowing tongues and fireflies underneath a dim lamp.
(Something I recently wrote. Nothing special. Nothing particular)
I'm running out of air. Glass beside in depth of myself and drifting with the tide. Leaving at the altar, she's listening as someone sings. Chained to entertained in wrong. A thousand tiny pieces only to shove them underneath a faint whisper. Cold gray, the curtain lifts and behold, my winter's wish comes crashing in. Dare not ask for more, we seek comfort in liability. 25 memories wasted on 2 dividing ways, the right and wrong of my arrival. Have not uncover the corpse before it finds peace. I find answers in the dark. Putting the fear of god in me with the wit of a gentleman and the sins of a child. A silence deaf to those surrounding a box of charmless words kept close, because I've held on so tight that I just might break.
Gut feeling crept up and surprises me. It's a wonder I can barely stand to look death in the eyes, for I know the strength of it's strangle by heart. My eyes play windmills for the lonely and bothered. The mother of my only miracle, I cradle. Wept hours before the tock and the ticks became loud. Enough time to run for miles, love to stay within arms distance. Only so much space left to mourn to an operator.
To be fresh and new, several shades of intimidation.
Simplicity is a suckerpunch, and if there were a time.
When memories reminisce with you or without you
and love were to lay at your feet;
bask in it. I wish I still could.
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August 12th, 2007
November 12th, 2005
11:54 am - Attention: Janelle.
The Steve Madden spring/winter boots selection disappoints me, greatly.
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October 26th, 2005
12:13 am - Imposter crap.
Myspace Profile; proves to be a lurker over the years.
The fact that 800 people believe this is what creeps me.
At least use some goddamn decent pictures, you skag.
She should pretend she's pregnant too if she wants to be *legit*, hehe.
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October 17th, 2005
04:57 pm - Unstarred.
Oh imagine, clean the noses & polish the eyes, Cobble street.
May celebrate. As the steps to the pedistal come crumbling down;
in oppossed to lifting major vocal chords. Mutually, but slumbered
& the only thing one can feel is the constant flutter, anymore.
That's something to be proud of.
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October 1st, 2005
04:16 pm - Peace of mind.
People, you can never change the way they feel.
Better let them do just what they will.
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July 29th, 2005
09:43 am - Had my ultrasound yesterday &
WING WONG. Turns out Lennon is a boy. Healthy spine & heart, likes
to hide his parts for the majority & wiggle his fingers at the screen.
Or at least I saw that, I think Kent was still trying to find the wang.
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June 25th, 2005
08:20 pm - Red. (x3)
i don't understand about diamonds and why men buy them.
what's so impressive about a diamond, except the mining?
& it's dangerous work, trying to get to you to. and i
think if i didn't have to kill, kill, kill myself doing
it; maybe i might not glisten as much for you.
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April 20th, 2005
February 13th, 2005
03:12 am - Something sexy.
I get to spend my Valentines Day at
a 8 hour photoshoot. Woofuckinghoo.
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February 8th, 2005
03:34 am - much a form of escapism; like heroin.
Why is my love life so fucking complicated
& why do I pick the most complicated people.
Isn't there a such thing as simplicity anymore?
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December 20th, 2004
01:54 am - Cleveland.
The conversation was going no where 'til
I turned my hair. He started touching me
& kissing me, like he didn't care.
I thought at first I should go home; but
then I fell asleep in the chair.
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November 24th, 2004
07:25 pm - Crazy like a rocket
Kiss me on the lips; when my heart just laughed it off.
Words may move, but they're never moving fast enough.
Celebrate the differences, I celebrate the songs you sing.
Just three words, my love: ______ ______ ______.
(secret words never to be printed)
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October 12th, 2004
01:17 am - He gave me reason to say it.
I'm shatter proof & I cannot afford to wait.
{'Yeah, you want me so you're messed up too'}
Sereen underneath all the wit. And vicariously, he's a secret
repossessed but he doesn't deal sugar without the prose. I'm in
oblivion pushing composure. Beneath an LA traffic light, it goes
straight to my hips and the ringing of the phone is just to rectify
until we're {we were already} beautiful again.
So before you break out in pale, you better shoot me down. And
say make no regrets with your reasons this time. Don't slow down.
I'll tell you, I can't be on best behavior. Just like the before.
Because you know when you've got mistakes that go unmade?
That's how you separate the men from the boys. Everything
is just a hat trick underneath the big bullshit radar, lover.
Shouldn't act dumb.
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September 9th, 2004
04:01 pm - I don't expect relating.
Sometimes, I don't miss staying in hotels.
But I've missed the distance away from home;
the whole fact-of-the-matter of being, completely
unreachable and out of touch. Where you can walk
in the streets and pass people who find your face
familuar, but aren't quite sure how or why. So they
ask you for a light or compliment your shoes to make
small, quick intermission and before you know it, you're
well on your way again. That's how this life is.
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September 7th, 2004
02:14 am - blasphemy
sincerity runs cheap and it led you right here.
so dear naive, move as if it's only a non-reality.
and keep pretending not to see the truth.
you'll learn.
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September 2nd, 2004
02:50 am - Moving in for the kill.
Downtown was madness this afternoon. And since I work downtown, coming home in the middle
of protestors; Bush supporters on one side, Kerry supporters on the other, was quite interesting.
You know, because the president was in town. Saw a few burning flags. Few Jesus preachers and
of course, shove a pamplet in my face and I'm all "I'm an atheist" and they scold you with their
eyes and need not say anything else but. Though, I was all tired and too geeked out to care, so
I made a joke. But them and their peanuts couldn't find the humour in it. So I went home faster.
Rushed back, picked up prints. Shipped those off to the agency for a client & more for mag. And!
Props to Michael for the Vodka spokesmodel gig he referred me for. Much love and appreciation.
And! I saw the magazine.
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August 31st, 2004
04:24 am - Big shot; so many shiny things.
Fish hooks. You're always using another word for exquisite when you speak. My arms ache from
pushing back conversations at which wills the essence to rise and fall. When you expect the
eventually, I'll come kicking down your door with the availablity. Seeking communication
with the the whimsical types who mistake snakes for apples. Because you have quite the
impression that I'm in need of something and you think you're just the person I should take from.
With the union of deception and the red letter betrayl signatures that we've so carelessly scribbled
our names along the dotted line - There you will stand, pulling out sweet condrictions with your
simple blue and artificial preachings of how love is a religion to justify those who seek change that
measures more than their hand helpings. Standard rules and you've always allowed yourself to watch
me; enamored because I'm shoved over my head and emphasized that you could even control a pulse.
But you're a thief at the blink of a eyelid. And you draw back an inch, but your hands are pulling the
waist in a little closer. Apologizing for the vulnerability and complimenting inebriating eyes that leave
no limitations. Until I'm neglecting struggle and finding the pathway back to that dance where I kept
you at aglance with me. Where I left your mouth and it's words that became congested, building up
hope and blocking breathing. When perfection only comes on film and if destruction is to be thought of
as beautiful, then I am truly magnificent when everything is absolute robbery.
You can't ignore the truth when it's kissing you on the lips.
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